Survivors Are The Most Beautiful People

It's hard to practice compassion

When you meet someone who has survived a tragedy, something makes you want to dig deeper, to know more.

How did they survive? How did that trauma affect them?

I recently had the great honor of hearing a good friend share her story with a group of us. At the age of twelve, she returned home from a junior high school volleyball game to find her mother and 14 year old sister murdered and lying on her parent’s bed. Both had been brutally raped and repeatedly shot…by a serial killer who was still in the house.

Her tragic story was interwoven with hope as she shared her painful journey of learning to trust God and people in an unpredictable world.

Needless to say, we were all on the edge of our seats.

Something beautiful happens when you connect with someone’s heart, with their journey. This connection is forged when they entrust you with their brokenness.

Though we have all suffered loss, some of us have become very skilled at putting our best foot forward while simultaneously pushing our grief to the back.

But ignoring the broken pieces of our life is a very dangerous thing to do.

As Berne Brown states so eloquently,

When we spend a lifetime trying to distance ourselves from the parts of our lives that don’t fit with who we think we are supposed to be, we stand outside of our story and hustle for our worthiness by constantly performing, perfecting, pleasing, and proving.

I don’t know about you, but I have been in all of these places. Performing, perfecting, pleasing, and proving…and there was only total emptiness in each one of those places.

Deep down, our greatest desire is to know and be known.

Fear of rejection, of abandonment, of not being enough…all these fears keep the tender parts of our hearts hidden. It’s just too painful to dig up.

I love how Rebekah Lyons explains it,

If we keep running from our true selves we’ll continue on a slow and steady spiral to the point where we’ll look in the mirror one day and not know our truth from our lies. We won’t remember who we truly are. Secrets have the power to paralyze us as long as they remain locked up deep inside. For we are shaped by our pasts, , by our passions, struggles, joys, sorrows and  and pain…but we need not be defined by it. Facing our experiences actually sets us free.

Unresolved grief keeps us in bondage and renders us incapable of deep connection.

But it is possible for you to embrace your past, your hurts, your losses and your disappointments…and experience incredible transformation.

In our universal desire to know, and to be known, the greatest obstacle is unresolved grief and it is connected to every loss you have ever experienced. It lays under all addiction and self sabotaging behaviors. It leaves us unable to live fully present lives.

But there is an answer.

Becoming complete with unresolved grief will transform every area of your life.

Get connected with us to learn more about the power of getting complete and about The Grief Recovery Method here at

Again, as Rebekkah Lyons explains,

As long as my stories remained hidden, I was in bondage. The more I discovered about my story and myself, the closer I grew toward grasping a sense of meaning.

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